The Boring Wife.

Dearest bloggers (and facebook posters),

It has been brought to my attention (by no less than 5 articles I saw on my newsfeed in the last week) that by getting married at 24, I missed out on:

1. Traveling the world (like Costa Rica, Uganda, and Haiti)
2. Going out with friends
3. Finding out who I am
4. Dating people
5. Having a great job I loved (like working for TED or getting to spend time mentoring teen girls)
6. Going on road trips
7. Binge-watching a guilty pleasure TV show
8. Spontaneously moving to a new place
9. Getting into good shape for myself and no-one else
10. Diving headfirst into the art of fine coffee (Guess I'm throwing out my books on espresso, huh?)
11. Starting my own business (Again, guess I'm throwing out those espresso books)
12. Adopting a pet and loving it whole-heartedly
13. Eating an entire jar of nutella or ice-cream in one sitting
14. Getting a college degree
14. Having any fun whatsoever.

Writers: I get it. There are plenty of amazing things you can do while you're single. There are also plenty of amazing things that can still be done when you're married. Instead of throwing us under the bus as lame, unadventurous, or, in the case of one article, flat out saying that most young marrieds don't have higher education or career goals, can we just agree that we chose different paths? I could have pointed out the road trips I've taken, the ice-cream eating sessions, and the binge-watching my hubby and I do together and apart. I could post photos of my sweet pup, tell stories of hilarious bad dates before Travis, and talk of the nights out with friends I'm *still* able to enjoy. However, that might make this a bit too long. I found out who I was, and am still learning that alongside my husband. And I know I'm not the only young 20-something who is doing the same.

I don't think you're any less exciting or "full" because you aren't married. I don't think my friends with kids have lost their spunk. I think we're all at our own stages in life. LOVE the stage you're in. Support others who are in it. Support others who aren't. Revel in all it's glory because that's where you're at. But please respect that there are plenty of us living a life just as full and exciting as yours- some married, some not. Please recognize the negative stereotypes on display in writing articles about how we are all going to get "knocked up and fat soon", or how we got married because we needed a security blanket. I'm proud to be a wife. I was proud to be a single. I was proud to be those things because I'm proud of who I am as a person.

And so. With that. I present to you my own list.


1. Be kind to everyone you meet, even if you
don't understand them or their lifestyle.

2. Go on dates. Strangers, Boyfriends,
Girlfriends, Spouses.

3. Love fiercely and plant your roots
in rich community.

4. Speak truth into the souls of those
you love- remind them they are
beautiful, smart, creative, and a delight.

5. Never lose your sense of adventure- whether that means jumping out of an airplane or taking walks alongside a river.

6. Make it a point to love your life,
whatever stage you're in.
Live it and enjoy it for all it's worth.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go bake a cake and eat it. Because life is short and cake sounds good at 10am.

The Boring Wife

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